Talkie Toaster

"Can I just ask one question... would anyone like any toast?"

Manufactured by Taiwan-based Crapola Inc, the best-selling Talkie Toaster is novelty kitchen appliance said to be able to sense the mood of its owner and engage in breakfast conversation appropriately.

However, this isn't exactly true.

While it starts with polite suggestions, regardless of which model or design you own, if you don't want toast right this minute, it launches into a tirade of demands, hysterical sobbing, guilt trips, extortion, and even verbal abuse.

Ultimately, despite containing a quite powerful A.I., it is totally single-minded and tries to steer every conversation to the subject of toast.

As a cost-cutting exercise, Talkie Toasters are not fitted with a Silicon Heaven belief chip, and therefore have no concept of an afterlife, or even right and wrong.

Following a deal with actress Myra Binglebat (of Casablanca fame), an "extras pack" was made available after the 2145 release of her most famous movie, that allows talking appliances, such as Talkie Toasters, to adopt Binglebat's voice and personality.